Pasty-gate

Greggs Bakeries have caused outrage in Manchester by introducing the supposedly “new and improved” cheese and onion pasty.







This scandalous move to change the recipe of the legendary pasty came to my attention last week. As I bit into my favourite savoury, expecting the heavenly taste and cheesy goodness of the great pasty, I was shocked to discover extra pastry and an extremely weird filling. I thought ok, maybe this is a one off occurrence, maybe there was a mix up with the order and Greggs received a batch of horrible Hampsons pasties. To my deepest disappointment- I was wrong!
On my next trip to Greggs everything started to make sense, “new and improved cheese and onion pasty” posters were proudly plastered all over Greggs. All my fears were confirmed, Greggs had changed the recipe - the classic pasty was no more. Following this bombshell, I quizzed the staff and found out that I wasn’t the only person to be affected by the change – other people had registered their disgust and the staff weren’t happy either. Something had to be done!
As soon as I got back to work I was straight on the phone to Greggs Head Office letting my thoughts be known about this apparent “cost cutting measure.” But, as is usually the case with customer complaints, I felt my protest fell on deaf ears and I was consoled with promise of some Greggs vouchers – although I didn’t see the point in sending them to me, I couldn’t buy my favourite pasty.
Even though I was slightly disheartened by the pasty apathy I’d experienced from Head Office I wasn’t going to give up, I couldn’t face going through life never tasting the delight that is a classic Gregg’s cheese and onion pasty - It was time to enlist the help of my pasty loving friends.


Register your disgust here


As soon as I informed the pasty lovers at work and at home about the terrible and shocking recipe rethink I had a whole host of people bombarding the Greggs website (follow the link above for complaints in the North West). This of course was brilliant, but the Save the Pasty campaign must not lose precious momentum at this make or break time. Tell you friends, tell you family, tell the man at the bus stop you see everyday but never speak to, shout it from the roof tops, sing it from the hills – stop this savoury stupidity now and BRING BACK THE PASTY

Scientology Panorama

Panorama Scientology episode, brilliant - car crash TV in fact, with two great car crash characters. It didn’t however tell me much about the Church’s dealings and I don’t know much more about the religion/cult (oh mustn't call it that) than I did already. The Church also missed an opportunity to perhaps silence some of its critics through this programme. Instead they employed a spokesman who wasn’t willing to answer Sweeney’s questions, got in his face at every available opportunity and also quite strangely, looked like a pumped up version of Tom Cruise in Jerry Maguire. Great PR, piss off and harass the guy making a film about you!





Oh and pissed he was - “YOU WEREN’T THERE FOR THE START OF THE INTERVIEW…” the flustered old boy from the beeb bellowed out – you can almost imagine him saying to himself - “people listen to me you know.”

This is brilliant - Scientology Spokesman makes BBC Journo blow up!

I loved this, I can't wait to watch the programme.

Myspace Morons, quoting the scriptures and the joy of vandalism.

Myspace really is a wonderful thing. It brings groups of people together that would never normally talk or come close to meeting. You get a picture of what people think and do on the other side of the world. You get to interact, build bridges, make “friends,” and my personal favourite - tell the freaks what you think about them!
My virtual journey into Myspace started about a year ago after being told about the site by a friend (a real one) who was promoting his band. At first I was very dubious about the idea and made a mock up character to put up instead of exposing my real self to a huge online community, after all it was just a glorified chatroom which at the time I didn’t want to be associated with. This did eventually change however and I started to embrace the idea more and discovered an interesting side of the site that didn’t contain posey pictures and pornstar chat. This side of Myspace was the groups section. Here I found people with opinions, debate, a place where lots of fun can be had, and plenty of opportunities for vandalism. The first group I signed up for was Hardcore Christians – Living Hardcore, this section of Myspace is filled with the believers and preachers – and is also totally devoid of reason. You may be thinking; why would anyone sign up for this if they aren’t a Christian, or what you might be thinking - a Christian hater? Well I’m neither and really just wanted to go on the group out of pure wonderment and devilry, and as I said earlier, to see what people on the other side of the world think. Well I found out what some crazies think:

Topic: I don’t know weather to be creeped out

Wendie, Manchaca, Texas, F/22
“[Some]one I know did a satanic spells because someone threatened to kill me .Oh and the guy that threatened several other people as well.”

The Caribbean Character, Catersville, Georgia M/37 – replied

“Wendie, if you're a Christian you have nothing to worry about. Even if this guy did "cast a spell", you are a child of t he living God who is a lot more POWERFUL than the god wannabe that he worships.

2Ti 1:7 For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.”

This is one of the more comical topics, others range from; the big creationism evolution debate to the evils of Harry Potter. One thing that most threads had in common was the blind quoting of the scriptures to justify a debate. This really started to annoy me, I could no longer start fun agitating topics such as “God is a lie,” “hell doesn’t sound that bad” or “what constitutes sex, I only did it for a few minutes and she was asleep,” without being shot down with a scripture. Ok, quoting the scriptures probably does have a place when interpreting the bible, but when your talking about voting republic, can you defend rape or hardcore rock it seems pretty irrelevant and even stupid. All that said, people are entitled to live their lives the way they want, but if you quote the book Vandalism 2007:05 “Doth moron that quote the old dead men, shall burn in a pit of eternal stupidity and wander the lands blindly and without reason”

Next on my group hit list “Military guys and the girls that love them,” “The Coalition of Non-Sexual Cuddling,” “Republican Girls Do It Better,” and “Mass Debaters”

You've got to love Myspace really!